Where my perspective comes from
You may be thinking to yourself: who is this guy who defends rich people and the love for riches? Isn’t he a rich man trying to defend his kin and his lifestyle?
I’ll explain a bit about my background: I grew up in a lower-middle class family, very much imbued with leftist ideas about economy and everything else. My mother (separated from my father) was a lower-ranking employee with a super boring administrative job. My father was an artist, occasionally performing in schools or theatres, and his girlfriend was a primary school teacher. I grew up in small apartments located in the ugly towers of the Parisian suburbs, in the midst of a lot of “diversity” and “cultural enrichment.” For many years I only aspired to be a teacher, being paid a low salary by the state (in France teachers are paid below average), and thinking that people working in corporations and with big salaries were materialistic jerks. I thought all problems could be solved by taking money from the rich and redistributing it to poor people/normal people.
But I “grew up” and figured out how the world works throughout the years, by being open to new information and by seeking the truth. First I became less extreme in my views on economy and society. Then I became “morally conservative,” acknowledging that traditions are good and that there is a natural law. Then, with the grace of God, I converted to Catholicism and this meant I had to definitively give up the Marxist ideas I held before.
As a Catholic, for some time I confused any kind of desire for riches with avarice, and I basically retained the same kind of ambitions I had before (being a lower ranking state official, or a lower ranking employee). I seriously considered priesthood but for various reason, I was discouraged from this path and started to think that my destiny was to get married and become a father.
Thinking about being a father one day, I had kind of an awakening moment when I realized how much it costs to buy a house and support a large family, especially if you want to do it on a single income. I thought to myself: “I just can’t afford that!” So instead of “doing what I love” and continuing my study of history in the hope of becoming a history teacher, I started to consider other options. I was thinking: if I want to be a good Catholic father with a large family, I need more money, a lot more than the regular salary I’d previously envisioned.
So I started to look at a more profitable career, looking at a boring job which pays well. I got trained in IT and even though I can’t say that I’m very good at it, a regular or mediocre IT guy with some experience can still be paid twice as much as a history teacher in my country. I also started various side hustles, still having in mind this idea that life with a family is very expensive, and that if I want to get married and be a good father, I need “a lot of money” compared to my lower-middle class standards – and I can expect little to no inheritance or financial help from my lower-middle class family. Now I also happily work on some business ideas, which may or may not work, but will hopefully teach me a few things in the process.
I don’t think I’ll ever become crazy rich nor really have the desire to achieve that. But my ambition is to be able to afford a home with a bit of land for my future children to happily live in, and to be able to put them in decent schools. And in my region and our current economic system, this unfortunately requires a lot more money than what the regular working man can make. Instead of being despaired or thinking that I should rely on my future wife’s income or on welfare, I decided to take action in the sense of improving my condition. If in the course of this process I am lucky enough to afford other things beyond the home and the needs of the family, that would be great, but optional.
I do not consider myself as a “perfect Christian;” but in my conscience, I feel no shame and no opposition between the will of God and this kind of pursuit. Neither should you, unless you are called to be a priest or a religious. I’ve got other things to worry about, morally speaking; I don’t think that having this desire and making efforts in that direction will lead me towards sin, or is the effect of greed or some disordinate passion. I rather think it would be disordinate to indulge in laziness or mediocrity, and later struggle with huge financial problems, put my children in public school and be forced to live in crowded and unsafe areas (or, on the other end of the spectrum, live in an extremely isolated where there are no family around nor friends or jobs) because I can’t afford anything else. That’s what I think I and every other trad men should be concerned about, instead of worrying that having a bit of ambition would be “materialistic.”
You can and should work at having a better condition
I don’t think it’s crazy thing to work for a better condition, and I believe most people are actually capable of improving their condition, each according to their respective skills and capacities, and especially if they’re still single. You have crappy job? Just resign and find another employer, or get some training in order to work in a better sector. You work in a dying industry? Similarly, you can find something else. Your profile is too generic and does not attract employers in your industry? Just specialize in a skill which is especially in demand, or capitalize on what you are good at instead of doing a bit of everything. Just be curious and open about the opportunities around you.
Many people don’t realize that in some specific sectors, employers basically pay you for learning very valuable skills; by that I’m not even talking about paid apprenticeship, which is an excellent way to get started in a career, but about companies offering junior positions in a super-hot sector where demand is so high that they don’t really care about the background of the people they are recruiting. It was basically the case for me when I started working in IT, people didn’t care that I spent all my college days studying the records of ancient Mesopotamia or medieval Europe. In my area right now they pay people to become train conductors, who will quickly earn a salary above the national average while being in a super stable situation, even though no degree is required.
People don’t realize that in some cases, if you are willing to accept a certain degree of inconvenience (like having to move a lot, or working outside of the regular work hours), you can almost double your wage compared to the “normal situation.” If you’re in need of money, you could do that for a time, and later impress your kids and grandkids by telling them the crazy things you did in your youth. For example, fishermen are actually well paid (in my country at least), because it’s a tedious job with a crazy schedule and extra work hours, sometimes days or months entirely spent at sea. People working in offshore platforms are very well paid. Why not have some adventure, if you think you’re in a desperate situation anyways.
Also people don’t realize that some unattractive and boring jobs pay very well because even though they are boring, they are necessary to companies or to the overall society. Accounting is an excellent example: it appears very boring to the general public, yet it is absolutely necessary for all companies in the world, so there are not enough accountants and they are often well paid because of the supply-demand imbalance. If you are a skilled accountant, you will never be out of work, you can find work anywhere at any time. Always look at the law of supply and demand when it comes to choosing a career path, especially if you are a bit irresolute about what you want to do in the future. Think about what companies need, and what they would be willing to pay a lot of money for; if that’s something in which you can be quickly trained and/or easily land an entry-level job, that means you have an opportunity right there. Companies always need accountants, sales and marketing people, IT guys, customer service or recruiters. Try to find the best balance between what you think fits your natural qualities, and what is in demand in the overall economy.
Don’t be obsessed about “doing what you like” if what you like is not something people are willing to pay a good price for. Typically, being a mediocre artist is one of the worst situations you could be in: you wanted to “do what you like,” and you end up doing things that you hate in order to survive. Artists often think of themselves as geniuses, and are disappointed that the world does not recognize their amazing talents, which keeps them in a negative spiral. That was more or less the situation my father was in – he left a pretty good job in order to become an artist, thinking that would make him happier; but in fact, he was quite miserable, because he had little recognition and was asked to do boring things instead of the stuff he likes. My brother is following a similar path – he wants to become rich as an artist, waiting for people to recognize his amazing talents, but such recognition is yet to be seen; right now, he is unable to sustain himself. I was about to do that myself at some point, dreaming of becoming a cool musician. We all thought “doing what we love” would bring happiness. But the reality of being an artist is that people won’t pay you for doing what you like, but for doing what they like and sometimes (if not most times) it’s not the same thing. What applies to artists could apply to any other freelancer or business owner. That’s just how reality works, it should not be such a hard thing to accept. But we don’t tell that to people, and they become disappointed. So be aware of that and submit to reality, instead of complaining that reality doesn’t fit with your desires.
If you think you don’t have any qualities or skills, you’re probably wrong (try to give it a second thought, and remember what people used to praise you for in your childhood and teen years), but guess what: many jobs don’t require you to be a super-talented person. If you’re able to read and write, able to carry a simple and normal workload, and behave like a normal person, you could already have a pretty good situation in any industry. As crazy as it may sound you will already have a competitive hedge against other people in the workforce who are just extremely deficient, behave badly, or don’t do the job they are supposed to do. The moral compass of many people is so broken that they don’t even think about doing their job properly: they only think “how far can I go without getting fired,” if they care at all about what’s going on around them – some people will keep doing things that should get them fired anyways. If you just are a normal person and do your job normally, you will be loved by employers and/or customers.
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It’s good for young men to focus on their career for a few years before they get really serious about dating and marriage. Wanting to hurry up and get married as soon as possible is rarely the best thing to do for a man. Once you are engaged or married, you will not have the same flexibility and the same ability to leave on a cheap wage, which can be a necessary step if you’re starting a new career and before you can earn something more substantial. The risk of getting married too soon is to get stuck in a subpar job that you can’t give up because your family absolutely needs this stable income that you have. You can make improvements of course (and the fact that you already have children and a wife to care for can really be a strong motivation), but you cannot take too much risk.
Meanwhile, if you’re a single guy in your twenties or even in your thirties, the world is a playground for you, you could do basically anything, live anywhere, and have the freedom to choose a better career or a better sector, or take crazy risks in some business venture, as you don’t care that much about failure when you only have to provide for yourself. You could fail two or three times in some major career decisions, and it wouldn’t be such a big problem. If you’re struggling in your dating life and still don’t have landed a good career, perhaps that’s what God expects of you, that you make efforts towards improving your situation, before He lets you find a good wife. Be aware that serious women are attracted to ambitious and hard-working men, and often disappointed or worried about the lack of ambition in a man. And it’s a normal thing: a traditionally-minded woman is looking for someone who can provide for the family. Don’t put the blame on women for that!
Tristan Berthelot
